Monday, 31 October 2022

From The Mind of Merc - History Repeats Itself (Part 2)

Sometimes I find my mind wandering over various eclectic topics and occasionally I am inspired to write some of them down. Today I was thinking again about history repeats itself – only this time a lot closer to home.

Associations have been made (including by me) linking Trump with the rise of the Nazi party in 1930s Germany. (An association which was supported particularly by the photo taken at THAT rally.)

However, from my perspective at least, similar associations can now be made for Johnson.

Let me explain:
In the 1930s, Hitler began an escalating campaign to takeover land in Europe which continued unimpeded or even challenged for years. Britain, which under the terms of the League of Nations was supposed to act on aggression, made occasional efforts to supposedly combat this with repeated and what proved to be unfounded threats of retaliation. Ergo, when Hitler threatened to invade Poland and Britain once again threatened to respond if he did so, Hitler had no reason to believe they would actually follow through.

In 21st century England, Johnson and the Tory government have been following an escalating campaign to impoverish, weaken and, at times consequently, endanger the nation and its people  whilst enriching themselves. This has also gone on unchecked or effectively challenged. Members of the British establishment (specifically those who are supposed to without bias monitor, review, query and when necessary act to prevent questionable or illegal activities) have repeatedly failed to do so. Ergo when Johnson and the Tories push through increasingly self-serving and (to the rest of us) punitive policies, they have no reason to believe they will be questioned or held accountable for their actions. 

However, just as Hitler was wrong with his assumption, I sincerely hope the Tories will prove to be wrong with theirs and that at long last the British public will prove that they will be not accept being mistreated like this.

Just as when England did nothing to prevent Hitler’s policy of aggrandisement so the British have done nothing to prevent the Tories’ policy of self-aggrandisement. We’ve threatened anger, displeasure and discontent but not actually done anything to prevent it. If anything the opposite as they have been consistently voted in – so we the British public are to blame.

However, just as with England in the 1930s, we also have the power to stop it from continuing.

This also links into another theory I had – which I posted about on Facebook – following Liz Truss’s resignation. 

I honestly believe the Tory government thinks we are idiots and that having gaslit us for a ridiculously long number of years, we will now agree to and go along with whatever they say/want/do.
Case in point, Liz Truss’s resignation – it struck me that she could easily be a Tory sacrifice, someone they put out there who was so awful at her job that she was designed to make Johnson look almost palatable. Like they’re trying to get us to think that we would be so much better off if Johnson came back. There are several things wrong with this theory (which I sincerely hope the British public realise):

1.        The mess was Johnson and the Tory government’s creation in the first place – Truss just compounded it
2.       Johnson was ‘in charge’ for years, Truss for 44 days. She was bad for a bit. Johnson has been bad for ages. And what she achieved in her brief tenure is nothing compared to what he achieved (or rather destroyed) during his time in power.
3.       Whether or not Truss was any good (and I’m not saying she was) does not in any way mean that Johnson was good or that the myriad of rules, regulations and laws that he broke is now somehow ok.

As with Hitler, the underestimated ‘lower orders’ are in fact the ones with ultimate control. Yes, it will be up the Tories to choose their new leader but we live in a democracy and it is up to us to say whether or not we accept their rule and want it to continue. In the end we have the power. That is why the Tories seek to control and manipulate us while they line their own pocket at our expense and try to distract us by directing our critical gaze inwards when it should be at them.

Consequently, whenever it is we manage to get a general election (and if there is any sense and justice in the world it’ll be soon), I sincerely hope we will not allow the Tory government to repeat their mistakes in the way they have run the country by repeating ours and voting them in again.

The choice is ours. The power is ours. We can make things change for the better.

Wednesday, 26 October 2022

Tories Out - !!!NEW!!!

And so the madness continues. Will the ridiculousness and the sleaze never end? Maybe a national chant will do it.

Vindaloo Tories Out not by Fat Les

What on earth is all this?
We're from England
Think we want this?
We won’t take no more of it
Listen

Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah (Stuff you)
Nah nah nah (Truss too)
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah Nah

We're England
We don’t want any more from you
England!
Had enough of Tory sleeze
Let’s show them the exit please
Want them, gone now
Not soon, right now
Listen

Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah
Nah nah nah Nah

We're England
We don’t want any more from you
England!
Me and me Mum and me Dad and me Gran
We're off to vote - no doubt
Me and me Mum and me Dad and me Gran
Because we want the Tories out
Because!

Tories out
Tories out
Tories out
Tories out yeah yeah
Tories out
Tories out
Tories out
Tories out yeah yeah
Tories out
Tories out

And we want the Tories out
We're England
We don’t want any more from you
England!
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
And we all like Tories out
We're England
We don’t want any more from you
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
Nah nah nah (Tories out)
And we want the Tories out

We're England
We don’t want any more from you
England!

Thursday, 20 October 2022

Goodbye Liz Truss - !!!NEW!!!

While it might have been more appropriate to use Another One Bites The Dust, for some reason this tune popped into my head so I just ran with it.

Sing As You Go Goodbye Liz Truss not by Gracie Fields 

Hee-hee, come on lads and lassies
The PM’s resigned again
Hee-hee, come on
Ee, let's sing of it

Goodbye Liz Truss and good riddance to you
44 days, but still you got it so wrong
You thought you could lead us
But you wouldn’t feed us so be on your way

Goodbye Liz Truss, you couldn’t do the job
Though you’re not worst, you still are not good enough
A lettuce beat you, the world knows it’s true
So bye, don’t come back again

(Tory) Blues, look at you now
You oughta know that we’ve no use for you
You’ll go soon we vow
The time of your Tory misrule is through
Though a new premier might be in sight
It is unlikely they’ll put it right

Goodbye Liz Truss and good riddance to you
44 days, but still you got it so wrong
You thought you could lead us
But you wouldn’t feed us so be on your way

Goodbye Liz Truss, you couldn’t do the job
Though you’re not worst, you still are not good enough
A lettuce beat you, the world knows it’s true
So bye, don’t come back again

Goodbye Liz Truss and good riddance to you
44 days, but still you got it so wrong
(Ay you, you just got it so out of whack, hee-ee)
You thought you could lead us
But you wouldn’t feed us so be on your way
(Hello, Boris, you back again? Are you? We’ll see about that)
Goodbye Liz Truss, you couldn’t do the job
(Gee, it's mad just how quick she’s gone)
Though you’re not worst, you still are not good enough
A lettuce beat you, the world knows it’s true
So bye-bye-bye-bye
Don’t come back a-gain

Friday, 30 September 2022

From The Mind of Merc - Trickle Down Economics

Sometimes I find my mind wandering over various eclectic topics and occasionally I am inspired to write some of them down. Today I was thinking about trickle down economics.

Despite every known example proving this doesn't work, the Tories have decided this is the approach they are adopting to resolve the cost of living crisis. Further proving they do not care one bit about the people they are meant to be representing and they are unashamedly and unabashedly out for themselves. Their supposed solution to the crisis being taking steps to make sure it absolutely and definitely does not affect them. (But I guess we shouldn't really be surprised considering their fingers-in-ears response to everything to do with COVID and their reaction to it.)

The effects (or actual outcomes) of this approach can, I think, be most accurately demonstrated in the following cartoons (found online).



Thursday, 29 September 2022

Queen of England

After 70 years of unfailing service, continuing long after the usual age of retirement, I think it is quite obvious that the late Queen Elizabeth II deserves a composition.
I actually found this quite difficult as I'm used to writing comedy parodies not serious ones but I hope this does her justice.

Love Me Tender Queen of England not by Elvis Presley
Did her duty, served us well
Never let us down
Had no choice but made no fuss
Faithful to the crown

Queen of England, queen for all
Now her day is done
We must say our last goodbyes
And we’ll soldier on 

Born the daughter of a duke
Became the heir at 10
Took the throne in ‘52
Then her reign began

Queen of England, queen for all
Now her day is done
We must say our last goodbyes
And we’ll soldier on

Now in twenty-two she’s gone
We are all bereft
Served us for 70 years
She is now at rest

Queen of England, queen for all
Now her day is done
We will say our last goodbyes
And we’ll soldier on

Wednesday, 28 September 2022

Oh Dear What Can The Matter Be (Pt 3)

Yet another parody of this anonymous ditty but, let's face it, it's another worthy occasion.

Oh Dear, What Can The Matter Be also not by Anon

Oh dear, what can the matter be
Liz Truss has won her battle you see
Now she’s our new premier MP
What on earth will she do now? 

She started out just like any one of us
But decided to change her ways was a must
A New Tory that’s what she is Liz Truss
And look at what she’s done now 

A new PM sounds like a new chance but we
Now know that is not what she will be
Her mini budget won’t resolve poverty
In fact here’s what it has done 

The pound has slumped to a 31 year low
Those rising bills continue their upward flow
Tory assets meanwhile continue to grow
And they still come out on top 

Their job is to run England all safe and sound
Instead they will run it into the ground
Amongst that lot there is no hope to be found
Cos they don’t care about us 

Oh dear, what can the matter be
Liz Truss has won her battle you see
Now we’re stuck until well after ‘23
We’re counting down the months now

Wednesday, 31 August 2022

From The Mind of Merc - Ukraine

Sometimes I find my mind wandering over various eclectic topics and occasionally I am inspired to write some of them down. Today I was thinking about the Ukraine. 

It seems relatively easy to dismiss the plight of this oppressed (& invaded) country from our thoughts so I endeavour to ensure it is never far from mine. And to demonstrate that, I am going to end this short piece with this simple image:



Tuesday, 30 August 2022

Egg sketch

And then an observation on another oh so normal occurrence.

Bill: Hey, Ben.
Ben: Yeah?
Bill: You see that feathery thing over there?
Ben: You mean the chicken?
Bill: Yeah. You see the hole at the end of it?
Ben: You mean the beak?
Bill: No – the other end.
Ben: Ok. What about it?
Bill: Have you ever thought about eating what comes out of it?
Ben: <pause> You know sometimes I worry about you.
Bill: What do you mean?
Ben: Well, like last week when you pointed to a cow’s udders and said you were going to squeeze those dangly things underneath it and drink what came out.
Bill: So what? It all worked out, didn’t it?
Ben: By sheer fluke. It could easily have gone terribly badly.
Bill: But it didn’t. So I think I’ve got a good chance of being right this time too. After all, I’m currently on a 100% success rate.
Ben: But it’s nuts! I mean would you want to eat what comes out of my ‘other end hole’.
Bill: Ew! No!
Ben: There you are then.
Bill: Yeah - but you’re not a chicken. Besides I wouldn’t have wanted to drink what came out if I’d squeezed your dangly bits either.
Ben: There’s no need to be personal.
Bill: Well, you started it.
Ben: And I’m ending it. You can’t look at an animal and decide ‘I’m going to eat whatever comes out of its rear end.
Bill: I can to!
Ben: You can not!
Bill: I can to and I’ll prove it – watch!
Ben: No Bill – seriously. Please don’t.
Bill: Just wait and watch.
Ben: I don’t think I want to.
Bill: It won’t take long – look the chicken’s sitting down already. And it… yes! It’s done it. Right – you see this oval-ish thing that just came out?
Ben: Yeah.
Bill: Well, watch me cos I’m going to eat it.
Ben: (to himself) To be honest, this isn’t going as badly as I thought it might
Bill: Watch
<crunch of the whole egg being eaten at once>
Ben: So how is it?
Bill: Alright. Bit crunchy and pointy. The bit in the middle’s delicious though. I might give that bit another try.

Tomato sketch - Mercorabilia

This month's catch-up starts with an observation on the simple act of eating a tomato. Was it always this simple?

Judge: Goody Badwife – you have been found guilty of the heinous crime of witchcraft and you have been sentenced to the most hideous of punishments – death… by tomato.
Crowd: <gasps>
Prisoner: No! Please! Anything but that!
Judge: Silence! The tomato, as we all know, is a member of the deadly nightshade family and thus an extremely poisonous plant. It will leave you writhing in hideous agony until your agonising and excruciating death.
Prisoner: No! Please! Give me another chance! If only I could…
Judge: Enough! Executioner – bring forth… the tomato.
Crowd: Ooh. Aah. Ohhh.
Judge: Now… eat!
Prisoner: <chewing> Er. Oh. Ugh. Ah!
Judge: Yes, that’s the poison now coursing through your veins as the agony takes hold of your body. Tell us now - how do you feel?
Prisoner: Er…. I feel fine actually. This is actually really good. Little bit unripe maybe.
Judge: What?!? That proves it – she must be a witch. No human could eat a tomato and live!
Villager: Uh… actually I have.
Judge: You have?
Villager: Yes. And she’s right – they’re rather nice actually.
Judge: Why didn’t you say anything?
Villager: Well, when you said they were so poisonous I figured maybe what I’d eaten hadn’t been a tomato after all. Turns out it was.
Judge: But this is preposterous! We can’t sentence someone to death and only have them eat a slightly unripe vegetable.
Prisoner: Well, I don’t really mind to be honest.
Judge: You don’t count. You’re the condemned party. We’ll have to come up with something else instead.
Prisoner: Oh, well. In the meantime have you got a napkin or something to wipe this tomato juice off with?
Judge: Napkin?!? We don’t waste napkins on witches. Executioner – chuck her in that lake to wash the juice off while we think of another punishment for her.
Prisoner: What? No! Wait! Please! I can’t swim!
<Splash>
Prisoner: Gurgle. Glug. Glug. Glug.
Judge: Hmm. It seems we’ve found our new method. 

Sunday, 31 July 2022

From The Mind of Merc - Purchasing Power

Sometimes I find my mind wandering over various eclectic topics and occasionally I am inspired to write some of them down. Today I was thinking about the power of the consumer. 

Not in the sense I believe I've previously spoken about of the ridiculousness of allowing retailers to tell us what we should want but more about the impact that every purchase can collectively have on the world of which so many of us are unaware and which I feel can be best summed up in this image: