Speech-wrecker (Part 10) - Mercorabilia

Today I'm sharing an alternate version I created of Prospero's farewell soliloquy at the end of The Tempest - the intention being for it to say the same thing but in modern day language (& I even managed to get it to rhyme)

Shakespeare's original text:

If we shadows have offended,

Think but this and all is mended,
That you have but slumber'd here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
If you pardon, we will mend.
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call:
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends. 

My alternate version: 

If you didn’t like the play you saw,

Forget it as you leave the door 

Tell yourself it wasn’t real 

Like something you cannot feel

If you didn’t like the plot

Maybe then you dreamt the lot

Please don’t be unkind to me

I beg of you on bended knee 

I try so hard to write the best 

But if it did your patience test 

To stop you dealing an unkind blow

I’ll make up for it with my next show

You have my word on that, I swear

So goodbye, it’s time you were not here

Please clap aloud and clap along

I’ll make up for all that I’ve done wrong