An MP Can Be A Crook - !!!NEW!!!

Listening to my favourite song from Mary Poppins Returns and the beginnings of these lyrics started forming in my head... so I thought I'd let them develop.

A Cover Is Not The Book An MP Can Be A Crook not from Mary Poppins Returns
We have so much at our fingertips
That we can access quick and how
And yet we still do not make the most of it
If we ever needed info
Then my friends that time is now
As rather than trust the media then we need to research it
Because an-

MP can be a crook
So please always take a second look
'Cause if you peer closer past the poster
You might find you were mistook
Please don’t ignore the warning signs
Take care to read between the lines
And what you find it might just leave you shook
For an MP’s your man
Unless your MP’s a crook

It’s-true-to-day, it’s all true so far!
It’s-true-to-day, it’s all true so far!

Excuse me Miss, could you give us an example?
Certainly!

Boris the Johnson it seemed was good
But what could not be seen was though
His outward show was honest
Well, his past was far from clean
So if someone chose to look what was buried down deep inside
They would find he’s not so nice
Yet he still won by a landslide!

Which proves
An MP can be a crook
So please always take a second look
'Cause if you peer closer past the poster
You might find you were mistook
Please don’t ignore the warning signs
Take care to read between the lines
And what you find it might just leave you shook
For an MP’s your man
Unless your MP’s a crook

Should we do the one about the tricky Tory?

Oh, by all means!

People love that one

Well, go on then!

Mr Dominic Cummings
His wife was not feeling so fit

So he put her in a car

Drove to Durham for a bit

Yet the country’s in lockdown
Which you’d think would cause a hitch

But if you're rich and make the rules

Then are the rules meant for the rich?

Oh, an MP can be a crook
So please always take a second look

'Cause if you peer closer past the poster
You might find you were mistook
It’s-true-to-day, it’s true so far!
It’s-true-to-day, all above par!

And what you find it might just leave you shook
For an MP’s your man
Unless your MP’s a crook

Oh, give us the one about the brainless bossman, why don't ya?

Isn't that one a bit long?

Well, the quicker you're into it, the quicker you're out of it

Once upon a time
(Not) In a nursery rhyme
There was a white house with a man
With an orange tan
Who seemed to think there was no-one that he was less than

He had fans and followers
Who hung on his ev’ry word
But despite his being the chief
Good grief!
It seemed he had a poor choice of what he should best do
A poor choice of words

Like his hands were not immense
His brain was smaller than a bird's
So the vice-man of the nation
Made a censored proclamation
"We do not need him understood
He needs to look good

Just like any premier should
His bright orange skin not withstood”

And they searched for the brightest
And they searched for the best
Who would endorse

All his recourse
Bring worth to what he did attest
But the man was a buffoon
So each professor quit their job
They did not want to be involved
With such a racist slob
It makes you sob
You start to wonder why it is
He’s so beloved by the mob

But then suddenly one day
The people realised a thing
They said, "If he cannot change then
It makes sense that we change him"
And the man’s team’s fears all grew

For they knew that this was true
That it was not hopeless
There was a way out of the mess

Cause to have a happy land
And to enjoy the world you've got
You should never let yourselves
Be ruled over by a bigot
So they sang and they cheered
They had found a way to end
The control of this despot who was
Surely not their friend

So the moral is you mustn't let
The media be the guide
For it's possible they lied
You need to make your own mind up
Don’t be hypnotised, you decide!
‘Cause the truth can't be denied
And we will not be defied
We can vote to change the world and
We won’t let the cheaters hide

That is it!

Oh, an MP can be a crook
So please always take a second look

'Cause if you peer closer past the poster
You might find you were mistook
So please listen to what we've said

And please never let yourself be led

So one more time before we get the hook

Please sing along!

An MP’s your man

Please take our advice!

An MP’s your man

Or you'll pay the price!

An MP’s your man

Unless your MP is a crook

It’s-true-to-day, it’s so true by far!
It’s-true-to-day, it’s so true by far!
It’s-true-to-day, it’s so true by far! Hurrah!

(Author's note: I'm not saying these are the only examples but they are certainly the most notable at the moment)