My second rap parody inspired by the brilliant
Princess Rap Battles created by Whitney Avalon (the inspiration for this one
can be found here).
JULIET:
It’s so sad and too bad that I have to explain
Why I am the best it just won’t sink into your brain
Got a play with a title named after me
The fact that you don’t makes my greatness easy to see
I’m the most famous heroine, you’re a bygone who is bygone
I am adored and admired because I truly found the one
I’m faithful and loyal, beautiful
I’m the best, beat the rest, you’re distressed, pitiful
It’s so sad and too bad that I have to explain
Why I am the best it just won’t sink into your brain
Got a play with a title named after me
The fact that you don’t makes my greatness easy to see
I’m the most famous heroine, you’re a bygone who is bygone
I am adored and admired because I truly found the one
I’m faithful and loyal, beautiful
I’m the best, beat the rest, you’re distressed, pitiful
OPHELIA:
I can’t believe you think you’re all that
Such a clueless ‘saint’ who is all too eager to lay down flat
You fell in love with the one man you should fight
And even with Laurence’s help couldn’t get that right (oh, no!)
Lost your head when he came on the scene
You’re clueless.
I can’t believe you think you’re all that
Such a clueless ‘saint’ who is all too eager to lay down flat
You fell in love with the one man you should fight
And even with Laurence’s help couldn’t get that right (oh, no!)
Lost your head when he came on the scene
You’re clueless.
JULIET:
You’re lonely.
OPHELIA:
You’re a naive teen.
That fickle, rash Montague was an awful choice
But stubbornly you followed your own stupid voice
That fickle, rash Montague was an awful choice
But stubbornly you followed your own stupid voice
JULIET:
Um, you should know, that’s not stupid, that’s romantic
To be without my love would have made me frantic
Just ‘cause you couldn’t get your man to stick around
Doesn’t mean your attitude’s the best to be found
You were foolish and deluded ‘cause you thought he loved you
Ended up in the river, where it’s so cold your lips turned blue
As for your flowers, that’s totally sad
Mumbling away for the love you never had
Does it really count as true love if your man turns you down?
His rejection made you the saddest in town
Um, you should know, that’s not stupid, that’s romantic
To be without my love would have made me frantic
Just ‘cause you couldn’t get your man to stick around
Doesn’t mean your attitude’s the best to be found
You were foolish and deluded ‘cause you thought he loved you
Ended up in the river, where it’s so cold your lips turned blue
As for your flowers, that’s totally sad
Mumbling away for the love you never had
Does it really count as true love if your man turns you down?
His rejection made you the saddest in town
My heartfelt emotions sent me to heaven
above
You’re just a crazy reject who nobody loves
You’re just a crazy reject who nobody loves
OPHELIA:
Half right, I carried on without my love, at least I tried that game
Which means you’re weak compared to me, aw that is such a shame
And who drinks a potion you don’t know about? (Duh)
And who thinks a knife is their one way out?
I carried right on - I was not co-dependent
Found serenity through loss which made me transcendent
And, oh yes, losing my boy’s love hit me the hardest
I’m the calmest, the noblest, and by the way the smartest
‘Cause a lesson to learn, to which you so need a shove
Infat’ation and lust is not the same thing as love
Half right, I carried on without my love, at least I tried that game
Which means you’re weak compared to me, aw that is such a shame
And who drinks a potion you don’t know about? (Duh)
And who thinks a knife is their one way out?
I carried right on - I was not co-dependent
Found serenity through loss which made me transcendent
And, oh yes, losing my boy’s love hit me the hardest
I’m the calmest, the noblest, and by the way the smartest
‘Cause a lesson to learn, to which you so need a shove
Infat’ation and lust is not the same thing as love
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