What time is it, Eccles (modernised) - Mercorabilia

I'm a big fan of The Goon Show and, inspired by a comment I saw online, I thought it'd be fun to try and create how the infamous 'What time is it?' skit if it had been written using modern technology.

Bluebottle: What time is it Eccles?
Eccles: Err, just a minute. I, I've got a screenshot of it ’ere on my mobile. A nice man did it for me this morning.
Bluebottle: Ooooh, then why do you carry it around with you, Eccles?
Eccles:  Well, umm, if a anybody asks me the ti-ime, I ca-can show it to dem.
Bluebottle: Wait a minute Eccles, my good man...
Eccles:  What is it fellow?
Bluebottle: It's showin on this screenshot here, what is eight o'clock, is showin.
Eccles: I know that my good fellow. That's right, um, when I asked the fella to do it for me, it was eight o'clock.
Bluebottle: Well then. Supposing when somebody asks you the time, it isn't eight o'clock?
Eccles:  Ah, den I don't show it to dem.
Bluebottle: Ooohhh...
Eccles:  [Smacks lips] Yeah.
Bluebottle: Well how do you know when it's eight o'clock?
Eccles:  I've got a screenshot of it on my mobile!
Bluebottle: Oh, I wish I could afford a mobile phone with the time screenshot on.
Eccles:  Oohhhh.
Bluebottle: 'Ere Eccles?
Eccles:  Yah.

Bluebottle: Let me hold that mobile to my ear would you? - 'Ere. This mobile phone ain't tickin'.

Eccles:  What? I've been sold a forgery!

Bluebottle: No wonder it stopped at eight o'clock.

Eccles:  Oh dear.

Bluebottle: You should get one of them tings my grandad's got.

Eccles:  Oooohhh?

Bluebottle: His firm give it to him when he retired.

Eccles:  Oooohhh.

Bluebottle: It's one of dem tings what it is that wakes you up at eight o'clock, boils the kettil, and pours a cuppa tea.

Eccles:  Ohhh yeah! What's it called? Um.

Bluebottle: His secretary.

Eccles:  Ohh... Ohh, ah wait a minute. How does she know when it's eight o'clock?

Bluebottle: She's got a screenshot of it on her mobile!

And if anyone's wondering why he didn't just look at the time on his phone... this is Eccles we're talking about